Wednesday 20 January 2016

100 Word Challenge Week #3 by Batman

Lazy River
Staring down at me was the appearance of a huge mountain as I floated along the gracefully, relaxing lazy river. Beaming down on me was the blazing yellow sun without a cloud in the sky. Trying my hardest to rest my body, looking down at my sensitive skin to see if it's bright red. Wishing I had brought my umbrella, I immediately started pushing my way back to the start. As the waves grew bigger, my arms got weaker, knowing it had gotten too hard to handle. "I guess my new nickname will be tomato" I said to myself.

2 comments:

  1. I think your story was great! Your punctuation is correct and I could really see what was happening in the story. The ending of your story made me laugh.

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  2. I think your story is very good and the ending made me laugh. I get a little confused when it says Trying my hardest to rest my body, looking down at my sensitive skin. Maybe you could make it a little bit clearer. You had the right punctuation and correct spelling.

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